“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”
Proverbs 21:23
Sometimes it’s best to say nothing at all.
Do you know the song that goes, “know when to fold them, know when to hold them, know when to walk away, know when to run?” The song is about playing cards, but the same can be applied to the tongue. Sometimes we tell it go, sometimes we speak up, sometimes we walk away, and sometimes we run. In three of those situations, we remain silent.
Being a writer, I’ve always appreciated the importance and impact of words, and I’ve tried to teach my AuDHD daughter this lesson as well. Of course, with her ADHD and autism, this does not come naturally to her. She pretty much just spits out what’s on her mind. The good, the bad and the ugly. The tongue can really get people into trouble.
The number of times we’ve discussed word choice, tone, and attitude has long been uncountable. But as much as using words wisely is a beautiful skill, knowing when to not use words holds equal weight. Often times, the better choice is to say nothing at all.
The other day, Kayla made me so proud.
We were driving home from school one day, and I asked her about P.E. (her least favorite subject). She told me how a girl in her class claimed to be the fastest among them. Apparently this was not—objectively speaking—true. So did Kayla say as much? Nope. She told me, “It’s not true, but I didn’t say anything. I just went with it.” She hadn’t wanted to hurt the girl’s feelings or start an argument.
I turned around (we were at a stoplight—don’t worry) and said, “You were wise!” and the smile on her face stretched from cheek to cheek.
Wisdom is not just for old people.
Let’s face it: There are a lot of elderly men and women who are foolish. Wrinkles might be a natural part of the aging process, but wisdom is not. Wisdom comes from the fear of the Lord. Wisdom is for anyone who would ask. God wants us all to be wise, no matter our age.
“If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you.”
James 1:5a
In this verse, there is no age limit on seeking wisdom. He goes on in chapter 3 to tell us where wisdom comes from and describes it:
“For jealousy and selfishness are not God’s kind of wisdom. Such things are earthly, unspiritual and demonic. For wherever there is jealousy and selfish ambition, there you will find disorder and evil of every kind. But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and the fruit of good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere.”
James 3:17
So let’s help our children become wise beyond their years and teach them when to say nothing at all.
Share:
Follow:
