“Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.”
Lamentations 3:23 (NLT)
Every morning should be a new beginning and fresh start for our children. We should let go of all the times they didn’t pay attention or think first or ask first. The times they were annoying or disobeyed the rules. According to 1 Corinthians 13:5, love doesn’t keep a record of wrongs. Love allows our children to not be weighed down by yesterday’s mistakes.
Let go. And DON’T pick it back up again.
Cool off before bed.
The Bible tells us not to let the sun set on our anger (Eph 4:26) and for good reason. I’ve noticed that when I go to bed upset, I often wake up in the same mood. How fair is that? My poor AuDHD daughter, who has trouble getting out of bed, doesn’t need me standing over her with a scowl on my face, ready to battle over something we’ve already hashed out.
I wish I could say I am good at this, but I’m not. The other day, when Kayla had been negative all evening and had thrown a fit before bedtime, I ended up going to bed mad at her. AND…I woke up just as angry. I griped and nagged about her behavior for a good chunk of the morning. And you know what? I didn’t feel better, and I made Kayla feel worse. I stole her fresh start by not forgiving her the night before. I let my pride potentially ruin her day.
For us too!
Every day is a fresh start. It’s a chance to do and think better. One thing that helps with this is beginning each morning with some Bible time. There’s no wrong time to commune with God, but something about praying and studying scripture first thing just sets me up right. Especially when I’m worried about that day’s events. Before they even commence, I can tell God what I’m anxious about and give them to his hands.
I like to say the Lord’s prayer every day. I don’t believe it’s required, but it is THE example Jesus gave. I sometimes replace the words on Earth with in my life. Additionally, I switch up the word bread for fruit. This is because I’m less concerned with my daily food and way more concerned about the Spirit’s fruit—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control—being expressed in my life. I cannot survive a day of motherhood with all nine.
As with our complex kids, we must forgive ourselves and allow the day to be a fresh start for us as well. We will screw up. There is no avoiding parenting fumbles. But we are the moms and dads that God has given our children. For better or worse. The Bible says the righteous man falls seven times (which may mean completely) but gets back up.
Every morning, get back up and allow our complex kids the same chance.
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